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Phoenix

 I feel there is something not talked about enough, everyone knows the feeling of failure. We all make mistakes, comes with being human, we all cope with that. How though do we cope when unplanned mistakes take place, I know your wondering what on earth I mean by this, most mistakes are unplanned… I am referring to the mistakes, the trials that occur even when the “rules” are followed, those that incur even when perhaps we have done everything right that is within in our power. This takes a different type of coping, paired with an even greater understanding and matched with yet a greater perspective. In order to cope and heal from these unplanned mistakes we need to evaluate what was within our control and what was genuinely not. Often times when things go wrong we immediately blame and criticize ourselves because let’s be real, that is much easier than accepting the unknown and accepting the true lack of control we had over the situation. It is facing this fact though that allows for healing and a change and perspective, we cannot control every situation and we certainly cannot control others. God gave us all free will, so when you find yourself in the right, that you did things by the book per say and it blows up anyway, I encourage you to take a step back and evaluate why with a new set of eyes. With these eyes I want you to take into account the fact we live in a very broken world, that we all have free will and that situations and people are unpredictable due to said free will. Now I want to challenge you further to find the blessing in the situation, I realize depending on the situation I may have lost some of you now. You may be asking yourself, what blessing? My situation is so bleak there cannot possibly be a blessing, yet I encourage you there is. I have always been very open and vulnerable on this blog, as a writer I feel that is vital if I can even help or inspire one person through my experiences. So here it goes, I did things “by the book”, got married, we planned for a baby and then it all changed. He no longer wanted me or that baby and just like that life went up in flames, yet out of the ashes the Phoenix will rise and I could not be more grateful for the flames because out of the flames not only will a phoenix rise, she will be born. Through the circus stances the flames have set us both free and that freedom is our blessing. She will have a dad who adores her and protects her. If everything had not burned to the ground there would be no beauty to show. Look for your own blessing, look for your phoenix and cling to it. 

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